Once again that old crisis of confidence has returned with the who am I? dilemma, which, prior to me getting into bed and turning the light off ready for sleep, hadn’t been on my mind at all, but as soon as my head hit the pillow my brain wanted a full scale discussion on the matter. The following is what we decided after our through the night meeting.
I am 48 years old, I am the youngest of 6 children, with two brothers and three sisters. Before the age of ten I had witnessed death, was sexually abused and contracted meningitis. I first came into contact with the criminal justice system when I received a police caution, at the age of ten, for criminal damage due to a window being smashed and here I am 38 years later, still a part of the criminal justice system. Over the years I have been in many institutions; secure unit, children’s home, detention centre, remand centre, youth custody centre, prison and mental health hospital. In 2009 I made a serious effort to kill myself through an overdose whilst in prison, were it not for my neighbour at the time I doubt I would be here now. I have had two failed marriages, been a failure as a dad, however, I’d like to think that I’m going the right way in turning that around, I’m certainly a better granddad, as was told to me by my lovely daughter Kirsty, the mother of my two beautiful granddaughters. I also have two great sons that I am incredibly proud of Taylor and Reece.
So!, in a way that is who I am, or is it?, does any of what I wrote define who I am? Stay with me, read my blogs and hopefully you will get a better understanding of who I am and see what I’m trying to achieve. Laters!!!!!!!